Humorous Poems of All Sorts
Here are humorous poems that simply refuse to be pigeon-holed or categorized. They express this refusal in an amusing way, of course.
This first poem is inspired by an actual question on a psychological test I took when I was in college. I don’t remember whether I passed the test or not.
| | It’s All In The Details
By Tom Mulhern
“Would you rather kiss a girl or climb a tree?”
This question from psychology
Is more than a little vexing to me
Because it lacks specificity
How tall is the girl, is she on a bike?
Is the tree in the valley, or up on the dike?
But if I’m honest and don’t try to out-psych
I’d say it depends on what the tree looks like.
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com |
Next up is a humorous poem based again on personal experience, this time in a big-box retailer which shall remain unnamed.
| | What's Your Hurry?
By Tom Mulhern
“Your photos ready in seconds”
The sign at the counter did say
Which led me to (foolishly) assume
The job would take less than a day
But what is a day but seconds
In numbers more than a few
And if ever my photos are ready
Then the sign will (eventually) be true
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com |
For more funny rhyming poems, follow this link.
I follow a highly-effective program for maintaining my weight that rests on two key components. The first is my careful choice of parents. The second is revealed in the following poem.
| | How Do You Stay So Thin?
By Tom Mulhern
No pasta, nothing breaded or caked
No cinnamon rolls freshly baked
No wheat, oats, barley or rye
No doughnuts and no chicken fry
The staff of life is killing me
And so my diet is gluten-free.
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com |
This will take you to a different set of funny hilarious poems to try out for size.
The next humorous poems entry describes an all-too-common experience. Some would say it’s part of aging, but I prefer to blame it on a build-up of undetected toxic chemicals in the environment.
| | Open Minded
By Tom Mulhern
I have a problem, I’m sorry to say
My brain has gone on holiday
It was here last week, I remember it well
But where it’s gone now, I really can’t tell
My concentration has left no trace
As I sit at my desk and stare into space
And space is all that’s left, I fear
In the spacious gap between each ear.
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com |
This link will lead you to a group of ever-so-slightly twisted funny poems.
My son Isaac has a strong interest in audio electronics. He is very patient in trying to explain the terminology to me. I still don’t get it.
| | Woof, Woof
By Tom Mulhern
Dancers are sometimes called hoofers
But tweeters are never called woofers
One if for high, and one is for low
Which is which, I really don’t know
But Isaac knows, he’s clever and smart
He can take stereo systems apart
And believe it or not, it really is true
Sometimes he can put them together too.
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com |
Here’s a short poem that offers unfailing advice for those overly-empty conversational moments.
| | Conversational Fluff
By Tom Mulhern
When you wish to speak
But have nothing to say
You can always tell someone
To have a nice day.
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com |
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