Funny Valentine Poems
Funny Valentine poems for those whose beloved has a sense of humor. It also helps if he or she isn’t hoping for something mushy and romantic.
Let’s start with a poem that takes the well-known imagery of Valentines Day at face value.
| | Cupidity
By Tom Mulhern
A fat baby with darts
Goes around piercing hearts?
Well, when you put it that way
What else can you say?
This thing about Cupid
Seems a bit stupid.
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com
|
Valentine fever sometimes inspires the taking of romantic risks. Unlike in the movies, there is not always a happy ending.
| | Nothing Ventured, Nothing Broken
By Tom Mulhern
He put his love out on the line
When he asked her to be his Valentine
He saw it as part of life's grand design
She saw an offer she was quick to decline
Perhaps if the words had been left unspoken
His heart would now feel slightly less broken.
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com
|
Funny Valentine poems should be direct and honest. Maybe not quite this honest.
| | Valentine Advice
By Tom Mulhern
“Won’t you be my Valentine?”
Is rather an insipid whine
Better to say it loud and clear
“You’re my best girlfriend so far this year!”
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com
|
Go here for an additional page of short Valentine poems.
Valentines Day is an emotional challenge when the one you love is far away. In this case, the emotion seems a bit misplaced.
| | Separated By More Than Miles
By Tom Mulhern
On this day of Valentine
My heart for you alone does pine
Upon my face a salty tear
Wishing that you could be near
Why did you have to leave that day
And take my love so far away?
Your parting words burn in my ear
"I'll call the cops if you try to come near."
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com
|
This collection of funny Valentine poems would not be complete without a short poem about selecting just the right gift. The accuracy of this observation is directly related to the length of time both parties have been in the relationship.
| | The (Boring) Voice of Experience
By Tom Mulhern
For your Valentine gift
The right message
To convey
You're safer with flowers
Than a skimpy
Negligee.
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com
|
Click here to leave funny Valentine poems and return to the Real-Funny-Poems home page.
|
