Funny Family Poetry
Here you’ll find examples of funny family poetry that looks for (and sometimes finds) the humor in the ordinary and everyday aspects of family life. Life is a funny thing, and families are part of the reason why.
Families are very diverse in their habits, routines and rituals. However, there are some things that seem to be fairly universal about family life. Like shopping.
| | I Shop, Therefore I Am
By Tom Mulhern
We’re off to go shopping, we’re off to the store
We’ve got lots of stuff but we want something more
Something faster and brighter, something shiny and new
Something to make us feel slightly better than you
Everything is on special, we’ll get two for one
And have twice as much before the day’s done
Are they needs or just wants? Well, why should we care?
We’re off to the store and you’ll find us there.
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com
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This next poem highlights a part of family life that often accompanies shopping (at least in our house), but it is certainly not limited to the shopping experience.
| | I Wasn’t Doing Anything Else Anyway
By Tom Mulhern
It’s not that she’s reluctant or slow
It’s just that she’s extremely thorough
And so I’ve spent a good part of my life
More or less patiently waiting on my wife.
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com
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The following funny family poetry entry was inspired by my son Isaac and a recurring dream involving dancing and monkeys.
| | Isaac’s Dream
By Tom Mulhern
I was dancing on a stage
In my dream the other night
The monkeys in the audience
Were not at all polite
They screeched and howled and hooted
And they even had a fight
But I think they liked my dancing
‘Cause they come back every night.
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com
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Some families feel compelled to display their family pride in a peculiar format, one that often seems to communicate more than the intended message.
| | It’s OK On A Bumper?
By Tom Mulhern
“Proud parent of an honor student
at High Achievers Middle School”
Bumper stickers of this ilk
Seem to confirm the rule
That boasting and bragging
Are somewhat less than cool.
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com
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The following free family poems are presented as a trilogy. You’ll notice there are only two of them. I’ll write the third poem just as soon as I get the appropriately pastoral inspiration. You can’t rush art. Or grass.
| | Leaves Of Grass, Leave Me Alone
By Tom Mulhern
I thought I would pass
On cutting the grass
It just didn’t seem very tall
Then it rained for a week
Now prospects are bleak
That I’ll be able to cut it at all.
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com
The Self-Directed Yard
By Tom Mulhern
A manicured scene
Of grass even and green
Is not how nature proceeds
So I choose to regard
My overgrown yard
As natural cover, not weeds.
© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com
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