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Funny Birthday Poems

Funny Birthday Poems Dogs



Say happy birthday with funny birthday poems that are just right. Or pretty close to just right . . .

Here’s a funny birthday poem for someone who is less than enthusiastic about their special day.



The Life of the Party
By Tom Mulhern

Birthday, smirthday
Why should I care?
Another year older
Another gray hair

A few more wrinkles
A little more sag
And here on the table
A bright birthday bag

Undoubtedly something
I won’t like or need
More ugly clothing
Or books I won’t read

Can I just pass
And be let off the hook?
Still, I guess it won’t hurt
To have a quick look

© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com

The following links will take you to funny birthday rhymes for those special birthdays that end in zero:


If you're looking for a truly unique poem, you can get a custom-made funny birthday poem by submitting the request form found at the bottom of this page.

As happy birthday poems go, this next one is short but not particularly sweet.

Funny Birthday Poems Pessimist
Best Wishes From Your Friend, The Pessimist
By Tom Mulhern

You’ve had a tough year
Enshrined here in verse
I hope that the next one
Won’t be worse.

© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com

Click here for funny birthday poems about Mom. She deserves special treatment, so she gets her own set of happy birthday Mom poems.

I’ve also posted a set of funny birthday rhymes written for a friend who stopped having birthdays a couple of years ago. She's now laughing in heaven.

Which is a good (if uncharacteristically-sobering-for-a-site-that's-supposed-to-be-funny) lead-in to the following poem:

It May Be Late, But It’s Not Too Late
By Tom Mulhern

It’s your birthday, woop-de-doo
Another year you’ve made it through

Some parts were high and some were low
But where exactly did the rest of it go?
And what is it that you have to show?

A few gray hairs, a pound or two
But about those dreams of things you’ll do . . .
Like learn to play tuba, or visit Katmandu
Or read “War and Peace” all the way through?

Whatever secret wish you may hold
Sensibly cautious, or outrageously bold
My wish for you, no matter how old
Is to act out some stories as yet untold

© 2009 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com

Not Accepting Poem Requests At This Time

The following links will take you to custom-made birthday poems written in response to requests from other visitors to this site. I'm not accepting poem requests at this time (too many other things going on in my life right now), but I hope to begin accepting poem requests again in a month or two.

Funny Birthday Poems Created
With Other Visitors to This Site

Click below to see the birthday poem tribute pages created with other visitors to this page...

Teresa's 47th Birthday  starstarstarstarstar
Ryan writes:

Teresa likes purple and she fusses a lot.


Tom replies:

Ryan, you are clearly a man of few words. A few more would have been ...

LOUIS G. SLATER'S SCANDALOUS 83rd BIRTHDAY 10-27-10  starstarstarstarstar
Sidekick Mom Slater and 8 Other Sticklers write:

LOUIS G SLATER /83YRS OLD

LOVES HIS SWEETHEART "DORIS" OF 57 yrs

RETIRED FROM " TWA -TRANSWORLD ...

Justins 30th birthday.  starstarstarstarstar
Emily writes:

Justin's birthday is 14th October.

He is not happy about turning 30.
He's learning to play the banjo, loves to run and play football ...

Leila's 30th Birthday  starstarstarstarstar

Ann writes:

Name: Leila
Birthday: 30 (Oct 1980)
Occupation: Office Manager

Leila is funny, caring, gorgeous, my best friend.

She loves ...

Jessicas 12th birthday   starstarstarstarstar
Caitlin writes:

Jessica plays the volin
-- she is really funny
-- she loves yellow
-- her favourite thing is campervans

She has a weird brother
...

Mom's 47th Birthday  starstarstarstarstar
Alex provides the following description of his Mom:

Name: Helen
Age: 47
Birthday: August 26

She yells a lot.
She is pretty.
She loves coffee
...

Paul's 50th Birthday  starstarstarstarstar
Rachel, Damion & Callan (& Alan) write:

Paul is very loud and has a habit of repeating himself(a bit like Fred Eliott from Corrie) although he won'...

Josephine's 21st birthday  starstarstarstarstar
Josephine's best friend writes:
This is for Josephine, nick name Josie, born 03/10/89.
She is doing an apprenticeship in hair dressing and changes ...

Drew's 50th birthday  starstarstarstarstar
Cynthia writes:
Drew nickname Droozy
Date of birth 6th May 1960, Prestwick (Scotland)
Mum and 2 sisters

Married 24th june 2005 (2nd marriage for ...

My Moms 47th birthday!!  starstarstarstarstar
Brittany says:
My Mom (Kimberly) is very quiet, very shy, and keeps to herself.
I like to embarrass her though. She is very talented, very creative ...

Dads 60th birthday  starstarstarstarstar
Louise writes:
Alastair Robertson
Born in Paisley
17th March, 1950
60th birthday
Hobbies = hockey, golf, tennis, squash, the pub quiz, star gazing
...

Laura's 19th Birthday  Not rated yet
Emily writes:

This is for Laura, on her 19th birthday.

Laura is crazy and spunky, but one thing that sticks out about her is that she was born ...

Greg's 55th birthday  Not rated yet
Teresa writes:

Name: Greg Ives
Age: 55
Birthday: 10/29/1955


Greg is an aerospace engineer at Honeywell, only child, uni high, biscuit lover,...

Humphrey 's 31st birthday  Not rated yet
Lillian writes:

Humphrey will be 31 on October 27.

Humphrey is a pastor. He is funny, really sweet, sometimes makes decisions without thinking,...

Chris' 19th Birthday  Not rated yet
Katherine writes:

Name: Chris

Turning: 19

Sex: Male (I hope)

Birthday: 29th October 1991

Profession: Life guard/Party Supervisor/Swim ...

Wade 45th Birthday  Not rated yet
Someone who knows Wade (and probably likes him too) writes:

Wade
45
race cars
works on pipe line
lives in wi
loves harley motorcycles
traveling
...

Gayle's 50th birthday  Not rated yet
Michelle writes:

Gayle has been a great friend for 24 years
She will be 50 on Oct. 24

She:
-- loves playing black jack in Atlantic City
-- loves ...

Amanda's 19th Birthday  Not rated yet
Chelsea writes:

This is for Amanda, who will be 19 on October 25.

She is funny, the best sister in the world, pretty, and a good person.


Tom ...

Ernie's 50th Birthday  Not rated yet
Lisa writes:

Ernie is very personable and extremely funny.
He loves to ride dirt bikes and drink beer.
He has a big mustache.

I haven't met ...

Jeans 60th birthday  Not rated yet

Joanne writes:

Jean is a grandmother becoming 60. Looking for something funny and slightly overwhelming.


Tom responds:

Hi Joanne. I ...

Jessica IS 19  Not rated yet
Ann writes:

Her name is Jessica

She's turning 19

She's tall, pretty, loves Shah Ruk Khan, loves to dress up, take pictures and has a crush on ...

Tammy's 47th birthday  Not rated yet
Rick writes:

Tammy is the boss around the house, all the girls (3) run to her with problems.

She has a laugh that wrinkles her nose that, to ...

Andrews 29th Birthday  Not rated yet
Diane writes:

Andrew's birthday is September 10th.
He is my boss.

Andrew likes music and has a caring group of people that work on his line....

Sadie's 55th Birthday  Not rated yet
Amoy writes:

Sadie is turning 55, 10/10/10. She is a registered nurse. She loves to watch BET and knows all the hip-hop and r & b songs.

She has ...

Steve's 23rd Birthday  Not rated yet
Katie and Gabby submit the following about Steve:

Name: Steve
Age: 23
Birthday: September 3

Description:
-- theologian
-- clumsy
-- bear
...

Collin's 13th Birthday!  Not rated yet
Cassi writes:

Collin in turning 13, and he has blonde, short hair with blue eyes. He's really sporty, and loves football. He makes me smile and laugh,...

Ellie's 12th Birthday   Not rated yet
Laura writes:

Ellie is 12 years old and her birthday is on the 12th of September.

She loves cats and makes me laugh and I haven't seen her for ...

Sharon´s 19th Birthday  Not rated yet
Francisco writes:

Sharon Velasquez is 19 years old. She is a call center customer service employee for Time Warner Cable.

Sharon is short but ...

Penny's 60th Birthday  Not rated yet
Heather writes:

Hi -
This is for my Mom.
Her name is Penny and she will be 60 Oct 25.

My Mom is funny, loving, and a cosmetology teacher.

She ...

Sarah's 21st Birthday  Not rated yet
Josephine writes:

Sarah is turning 21.
She wants to travel the world.
She is:
-- always with her father
-- never had a boyfriend
-- always ...

Phil's 47th Birthday  Not rated yet
Jessica writes:

Phil Mellor
-- age 47
-- male
-- painter and decorator
-- he is very funny , a pommy from England
-- thinks he is the most ...

Sparky's 55th birthday  Not rated yet
Lauren writes:
His real name is Roger, and he's my new husband!

He's been in the electrical industry most of his life in a marketing capacity.

He'...

Jasons 19th birthday  Not rated yet
Racheal writes:

Jason is
19 years old
male
UFA worker
Girly tendencies

To which Tom replies:

OK, Racheal, you've provided us with an ...

Josie's 21st Birthday  Not rated yet

Tamica writes:

Josephine's 21st birthday
She is my little sister
Her nick name is packalunch
Her date of birth is 3/8/89

She is doing a hair ...

Happy 40th Birthday  Not rated yet
Someone who didn't leave their name writes:

Her Name Is Kelly.
She's Turning 40.
She's Female.
Like's Taking Photo's & Making Them Look Pretty....

Connor's 12th Birthday  Not rated yet
Megan says that:

Connor is
sweet
caring
lovely
honest
kind
beautiful
adorable
she is my bffl (best friend for life)
she is there for me if ...

Allison's 47th birthday  Not rated yet
Our unidentified source has this to say about Allison:

She is
very opinionated,
artistic,
mother,
daughter,
sister,
friend,
my co worker
...

Ashley's 19th birthday  Not rated yet
Some person writes:

Ashley is
sweet
caring
lovely
honest
kind
beautiful
adorable
sexy
apple pie
drinker

Tom replies:

Ashley, I don't ...

Sarah's 19th Birthday  Not rated yet
Shenay writes:

Sarah is always a laugh,
Loves netball
Will become a pro

She is my best friend
Always and forever
My English friend

Tom ...

Nicki's 26th birthday  Not rated yet
Tami writes:

Nicki was born June 2nd 1984 and from that day on she has never wanted to sleep -- she is afraid she would miss out on something.

She ...

Ken's 55th birthday  Not rated yet
Crazy Kerry writes:

Ken is a very dear family friend. A wonderful husband and father of two girls. He is a short skinny man, wears glasses and has ...

Margaret's 21st Birthday  Not rated yet
Alicia writes:
Margaret is:
-- 21 years old
-- female
-- birthday is 25th May 2010
-- funny
-- annoying
-- pretty
-- ugly
-- funny looking

Tom ...

Brian's 16th Birthday  Not rated yet
Cindy writes:
Brian is happy & outgoing.
Mom

Tom replies:
Cindy, if a typical picture is worth a thousand words, then this one must be worth ...

Diane's 55 Birthday  Not rated yet
H Rogers writes:

Diane is shy, yet she loves to correct spelling. She had a blast when she was young, and she enjoys eating healthy low fat foods....

Dad's 60th Birthday  Not rated yet
Karen writes:

Name: Ken
Date of Birth: 2nd May 1950
Sex: Male
Age on Birthday: He will be 60!
Wife: Maureen
Me (only daughter; Karen)
Mother ...

Jessica's 19th Birthday   Not rated yet
Joanne says:
Her name is Jessica but they call her J Wherlz. She's 19. Her birthday is April 21st.

She's a nursing student. Honest, outgoing, exuberant....

Taylor's 12th Birthday  Not rated yet
Brooke says:
Taylor is my BFFIAEE(best friend forever in all entire eternity).

She is really nice and sweet, and is a triplet. She says they are ...

Fred's 55th Birthday  Not rated yet
Sherry writes:

Fred:
-- Plays the piano
-- Is easy to get along with
-- Owns a Harley and
-- Starts a new job on Monday.

Tom responds:

Sherry,...

Steven's 19th Birthday  Not rated yet
Molly says:
Steven is 19 years old and was born on April 7th 1991. He loves to be the center of attention: friendly, outgoing, loveable, giraffe.

Tom'...

Cas's 47th Birthday  Not rated yet
Ruby and Carla's description of Cas:
Athletic, sporty, fun, playful,
Tom's response:
OK, Ruby and Carla, your 4-word description of Cas left a ...

Wife is 55 Today  Not rated yet
Liz is 55 today (DOB 1/14/55). My wife and I are both unemployed. We enjoy hiking and snowshoeing. Liz is very opinionated and usually speaks her mind....

Carla's 47th Birthday  Not rated yet
Carla Jewell was born on January 9,1963, 47 years ago. She is a Terrific Mom and sister. She works at the school cafeteria in Pawnee, OK. Carla attended ...

Leona's 21st Birthday  Not rated yet
Leona loves make up and everything glamorous. She wears hair extensions, and works in a hairdressers as a colour technician. Leona is very ditzy. She ...

Birthday Number 55  Not rated yet
To get this section of the web site started, I'm entering a poem that I wrote for the 55th birthday of my wife. Many happy more, Yolanda!

It's your ...


Fun And Fabulous Birthday Party Ideas
Whether you're looking for great theme party ideas, a few ice breaker games, or ideas for costumes, decorations, party food, cakes, or favors, Birthday-Party-Ideas-101 is a fantastic resource filled with themes for all ages.

Click here to return to the real-funny-poems.com home page.

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