12 Days of Christmas Parody
This 12 Days of Christmas parody is an original funny Christmas poem that has been (sort of) set to music. That would be me singing and playing the banjo. Note that this recording is "demo" quality. I'll let you decide whether that stands for "demonstration" or "demolition."
Click on the arrow to listen:
| | Five Golden Rings
By Tom Mulhern
The twelve days of Christmas have all passed me by
And I scarcely believe that it’s true
Now I can’t for the life of me understand why
All of those gifts came from you
I should have suspected when first I did see
A fat partridge in a pear tree
A bird eating fruit leaves a lot of debris
So why would you send one to me?
Then two turtle doves came cooing my way
With three hens that only spoke French
And four birds a calling and squawking away
Oh what a racket, and oh what a stench!
But those five golden rings
Those five golden rings
Shining so bright, they light up the night
Oh those five golden rings
Six geese a laying deposit their eggs
Wherever they feel inclined
And seven swans swimming around in my tub
Is a surprise I’d rather not find
But those five golden rings
Those five golden rings
Shining so bright, they light up the night
Oh those five golden rings
Eight maids a milking their cows in my yard
Are surely a strange sight to see
I don’t mind their bellowing and tromping around
But remember my diet’s lactose free
Those nine ladies dancing and gliding with grace
They made such a beautiful sight
But those ten lords a leaping all over the place
Made me feel hateful toward all men in tights
But those five golden rings
Those five golden rings
Shining so bright, they light up the night
Oh those five golden rings
With eleven pipers piping, how could it get worse?
What more could you possibly send?
Then twelve drummers drumming marched into the room
And I think I just went round the bend
Thank heavens its over, thanks heavens you’ve ceased
There’s nothing more that you can do
Your gifts drove me crazy but now I’m at peace
Cause I’m sending them all back to you
Yes I’m sending them all back to you
Our romance is over, our romance is through
And I’m sending them all back to you
But those five golden rings
Those five golden rings
Shining so bright, they light up the night
I’m keeping those five golden rings
Yes I’m keeping those five golden rings.
© 2007 by Tom Mulhern - www.Real-Funny-Poems.com
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